“Good, great, we’ve established that no one cares. Who exactly am I not caring about again? Otherwise, you’ll just going to forever be Boring Legless Man. Unless you prefer that, but it really lacks something as even a stage name.”
I’m not entirely legless. It’d be inaccurate to call me that, and I think that’s even ruder than calling me Boring Legless Man in the first place.
You tell me your name first.
“The point isn’t to be nice. I am a super villain after all.”
“Megamind, Incredibly Handsome Criminal Genius and Master of all Villainy! Now you go~”
I will. And fine. I don’t care if you care anyway.
“Good, great, we’ve established that no one cares. Who exactly am I not caring about again? Otherwise, you’ll just going to forever be Boring Legless Man. Unless you prefer that, but it really lacks something as even a stage name.”
No. Just – no. The wheelchair is fine as it is. Please stop suggesting really shitty ideas. Oh my god.
It’s not even like I need the wheelchair, I just don’t know where my prosthetic is right now. And please don’t suggest anything for a replacement leg because I can only see this going really, really poorly.
Well. He has a point about the wheels thing. But fuck you anyway.
You find an elevator. Or just don’t go upstairs.
A mini cannon is stupidly unnecessary. And dangerous. You should’ve stopped at cupholders.
“That’s incredible mundane, also inconvenient. Fine!” waving his hands dismissively, “Forget the defensive weaponry.”
“Just think multi-directional mobility legs,” already dreaming up the schematics in his head, “With a harness you could even forget the stairs entirely and go straight up the wall!”
“Oh, that’s just sad. The design of that contraption is appallingly basic. Where is the innovation or automation? Hmm,” tapping his chin, “Crab legs for all terrain versatility, cupholders, spikes, a mini cannon… maybe undercarriage lighting and of course a sound system.”
… It’s a wheelchair. A chair with wheels. That’s really all it needs – why the fuck would anyone need a mini cannon?
“Because wheels are incredibly poor as a means of mobility?” waving his hands hopelessly as if the explain everything, “How do you go upstairs with wheels? YoU DON’T!”
“Oh, that’s just sad. The design of that contraption is appallingly basic. Where is the innovation or automation? Hmm,” tapping his chin, “Crab legs for all terrain versatility, cupholders, spikes, a mini cannon… maybe undercarriage lighting and of course a sound system.”
RP backup 