“Fuck…” Syx blew out a breath, “I… don’t know what to do…” he worried his lower lip between his teeth. His emotions in turmoil. Shifting, he pulled back just enough to get a breath of air that didn’t smell of Lyn. To try and clear his head.
With his legs curled beside her, the blue alien let his thoughts vocalize into the air between them. As he rambled softly, he ran his fingers over the fabric of the sheets below them.
“My mate is Anna… you met her at least once… the black wolf? She… knows about this. About me and you. But… this is still… half the time we’re at each other’s throats,” he rubbed his hands over his face roughly, “I’ve slept with all of five people, Em. But all the others I at least had it okayed beforehand, the fact that no one is the only one… even if in the end it fell apart because of that… Except you. Because it wasn’t supposed to happen. Wasn’t supposed to happen again. And again.”
He blushed lavender, his fingers brushing her leg, “You drive me insane. You push every one of my buttons. Somedays I swear I want to hit you until we’re both bleeding… somedays I just want to bite you and feel your teeth on my skin in turn,” his eyes darkened, oh the marks they’d leave on each other, “but this… it can’t be healthy…” he sagged, “But the truth is, your nicotine. I can’t quit you.”
Lyn could feel the way the liquor she drank made her head swim with emotion she would have otherwise shut down before it could be expressed, would have held herself back instead of getting to a point her eyes watered around somebody other than her Father or Char. Though then again, it was likely a testament to just how much she really did trust the alien that she had just lay with. She felt sated, felt herself relieved beyond relief… so why did her heart hurt so deeply?
She looked down, feeling a keen sense that she wouldn’t truly belong with anybody but a very few select people. She told herself that this was fine, despite how deeply she craved touch and affection even if Syx denied her the affection she wanted. Shaking her head with his words, she began to stand from where they lay, hearing his words as he continued on to try to reason with it all.
“…Nah… yer right,” She muttered, words slurred from the intake of alcohol, swaying in her spot a moment before her tail shifted to regain what had momentarily been lost. “Imma make it real simple for ya..” She murmured, knowing exactly where this was going. She’s been here before.. she knows what happened… and she will make damn sure she will let go first before she is given up on yet again. She hated how her heart ached with the thought of it alone.
“This is done… over. Not gonna happen again.. I won’t touch you… I won’t fuck you… whatever we got goin on batween tha sheets is done. The rest…. can stay…” she spoke the final words quietly as she bent to retrieve her clothing.
“Lyn…” oh god, he hadn’t expected that to hurt as much as it did. To hear those words. He’d thought about it himself. Putting limits on their odd relationship… he just hadn’t the will to go through with it. Syx squeezed his eyes shut. His chest felt tight but he fought to not curl in on himself. At least she couldn’t read him nearly as well as Anna or Harrison could…
Sucking in a breath, he agreed numbly, “That would prob-ab-olly be safer… yeah…” to end things before it got even messier, “Just… rivals…” the word felt heavy on his tongue but it’s what they really were, wasn’t it?
There was absolutely no denying the fact that their relationship was the furthest thing from being normal, nor even healthy, quite honestly. Constantly dancing between bickering, being friendly and tumbling between the sheets, it was always a toss up to just what would happen between them whenever they ran into one another. It wasn’t something Lyn really thought too much on, though of course Jim did know what all went on (even if he didn’t like it). Even if she didn’t know what it was that was goign on between them, it didn’t stop her from creating some kind of bond with him… and she thought she had made that much clear.
Though now, she wasn’t so sure. She hated the fact that her eyes closed as he cupped her cheek, hated the fact that she leaned into the touch she craved so deeply. She didn’t even react in the slightest when he spoke the nickname generally only Jim used… but then again Syx was among the very few she would tolerate calling her that. She was just about to pull away when he kissed her, taking in a sharp breath through her nose, exhaling heavily when he pulled to press his forehead against hers.
His question wasn’t met with an immediate answer, sighing out slowly with a low noise in the back of her throat, “..Fuck if I know… I jus’ know… if ya need somethin’ ta change.. I can change.. I can..” she murmured, her words quiet as she kept her eyes closed. Behind her lids she could see the images of her Father, Char, Bell… and Syx.
“Fuck…” Syx blew out a breath, “I… don’t know what to do…” he worried his lower lip between his teeth. His emotions in turmoil. Shifting, he pulled back just enough to get a breath of air that didn’t smell of Lyn. To try and clear his head.
With his legs curled beside her, the blue alien let his thoughts vocalize into the air between them. As he rambled softly, he ran his fingers over the fabric of the sheets below them.
“My mate is Anna… you met her at least once… the black wolf? She… knows about this. About me and you. But… this is still… half the time we’re at each other’s throats,” he rubbed his hands over his face roughly, “I’ve slept with all of five people, Em. But all the others I at least had it okayed beforehand, the fact that no one is the only one… even if in the end it fell apart because of that… Except you. Because it wasn’t supposed to happen. Wasn’t supposed to happen again. And again.”
He blushed lavender, his fingers brushing her leg, “You drive me insane. You push every one of my buttons. Somedays I swear I want to hit you until we’re both bleeding… somedays I just want to bite you and feel your teeth on my skin in turn,” his eyes darkened, oh the marks they’d leave on each other, “but this… it can’t be healthy…” he sagged, “But the truth is, your nicotine. I can’t quit you.”
Alcohol was no stranger for this feline, though generally it was very rare for her to get to this level of drunkenness. She was a woman that could definitely hold her alcohol, her metabolism so fast and the demonic blood that ran through her veins allowing for a higher tolerance than any other. Aside from her Father, of course. It wasn’t terribly often that she got to this kind of a level, and it was the alcohol that took away any inhibitions she may have had otherwise. Though of course, sex with Syx wasn’t something that was entirely out of the ordinary to begin with. It was his words of ending whatever was happening between them, or stopping it or not being able to do it or whatever he had done had reached into a part of her she honestly didn’t know she had.
The feeling that he was abandoning her speared through her hard enough for her to speak without thinking, the drunken words flowing from her tongue without hesitation or second thought. She refused to let Syx be one more person that could possibly abandon her, thinking him to be doing exactly that. She wasn’t sure what was going through her mind, not bothering to think too hard on much of anything, even when he stared at her as he was now.
“Why would I what?” She demanded, ears turning back with irritation as she glared at him with wet eyes. “I didn’ fuckin’ stutter. Ya don’t get ta leave.. I don’t… I can hate you again.. I swear… I can hate you, please jus’..” she stopped, looking away with a bitter expression.
He’d barely even gotten his pants on, sitting on the edge of the bed. He’d drank some too, at Lyn’s drunken insistence. It was how they’d ended up here. Again. In this strange dance somewhere between love and hate and familiarity. He’d known her through all of her youth… his mate had been accidentally wearing Emmalyn’s face when they’d first fallen in love… it made everything so messy. It made it impossible for him to sort out what he really felt for the woman beside him now.
But her desperation and pain had his arms reaching instantly, blue hand cradling his pale pink cheek, “Em… Lyn… That’s not what I meant… it’s just not… you don’t normally…”
He blew out a breath through his nose, there was no good way to end that thought. So he kissed her instead.
His forehead pressed against hers, he grumbled, “What even is this?”
Syx froze at those words. His activities in the criminal world had been quiet of late. Not more grandstanding with Metro Man. He hadn’t even been arrested in four months… he’d been focused on sorting out his own life. In settling in with Anna. If figuring out his place in the multiverse…
And so he hadn’t been seeing as much of Lyn. He can’t even recall what he’d just said to her. The words had leaked out of his mind at her reaction. As it was, it had been an ever odd war inside of him at their strange relationship. It defied words or explanation. But… never in a million years would he have expected to hear those words from the feisty Hell Cat.
He’d been in silent shock for too long before he croaked out, “Leave -what?” he shook his head, trying to make the words order themselves in a logical way, “Emmalyn… why would you…?”
RP backup 