bengalisms:

        ❝ Jewel tone? What does that even mean? ❞ Caspian asked with a smirk, licking those plump lips clean from the curry sitting on their edges. Amusement and curiosity sparkled in those golden hues, watching her as she explained how emerald might bring out her eyes. He laughed gently, turning attention back towards his meal as he began to work the naan into the paste and rather up some of the rice and food he had brought for lunch.

        He knew himself, the fear of judgement and of being seen for what you were born as. How crippling and awful such a feeling could be. To creep inside you chest and ^grip you so tightly your only relief was to curl in on yourself and pray it might end soon. There was no relief from the eyes that stared at him either. The boy who didn’t fit anywhere. The boy who was strange and unpredictable. Who would burst and break at the drop of a hat and who was stupid. Gods he knew they all thought him to be an idiot. It came with the Jock territory no doubt. Captain of the soccer team who got awful marks was the most cliche thing about all those terrible high school movies his friend made him sit through. Every time he saw them he thought ‘thats me, the jock that goes nowhere’. 

        At least he had his music. Whenever he sang at the parties, it seemed everyone forgot about his grades and focused on him. Focused on the words and the tune –– ignore the boy before them who’s flesh was broken and torn. Focus on the voice he still had… It was the only thing that hadn’t broken from his past-life. It always made him feel more whole, much like how Belle felt about this elaborate princess tale. 

        ❝ Is it still in true Princess fashion to use glow bugs for the lights on the dress? I think I saw that in a movie once. ❞ He quipped as he brought another handful of his meal to his lips. Chewing for a few more moments before he licked his fingers noisily, and his lips along with it. He liked encouraging her. Knowing that she was a little different from everyone else just made her more fun in truth. In Caspian’s mind… These chats, whether they were real for her or hypothetical for him, it didn’t truly matter. 

“Oh. My. God. Caspian. Jewel tone, it’s self-explanatory,” Belle waved she hand widely, “Ruby, Emerald, Saphire, dark and more saturate. Those bright pastel pinks and purples, I’m soooooooo over it.”

Finally remembering that she should eat. Her meal was far less glamorous than her friend’s lunch. Her dad had been busy again, his time split between his evening security job and his new passion writing. But that meant he was sleeping most mornings and writing most afternoons. So Belle had made her own lunch, which always took too much energy. So she’d just thrown anything into her sack that sounded okay. A pudding cup, snack crackers, a PB&J, baby carrots (the whole bag), and a partial bag of baking chocolate chips. She broke into the carrots, crunching loudly.

“You know, your skin tone in right for some really lovely greens… or maybe a metallic copper…” she hummed and tapped a carrot on her chin, “Would blue be too much? Either way you tots gotta let me do your makeup next time you sing. OH! Smokey eyes and blue lips!”

She grinned widely at him, vibrating with energy. She loved makeup, the louder the better. She’d been sent to the principle’s office many an occasion for her makeup in the first months of the school year. Finally, she had relented and kept it toned down to natural colors. With great reluctance. She loved the color theory, the application. The way it transformed the face. The way it was a mask against the world. The way she could make her face say what she often didn’t have the voice to say herself. How she could say ‘fuck you with a spoon’ with a perfectly winged point. Instead of looking in the mirror and just seeing a sad sham, a scared girl who was too dark and too male and too wrong to be wanted. A sad thing that had spent her whole life struggling and failing to make friends.

And god… part of her was still terrified about how Caspian would look at her if the mask was gone. She thought she knew him. Was nearly positive she could trust him. That he’d never reject her… but it had happened so often in her life. She’d thought again and again that she had made a new friend… only for her heart to get ripped out. But this was different, wasn’t it? Please… please… let this one stick. She needed more people in her life than her father and her childhood best friend, Mingan.

She barely gave Cas the time to speak before she slapped the table, standing in her excitement, “AH HA!” realizing what she did, her dark skin flushed and she collapsed back on the bench. Her smile lit up her whole face. Leaning in she tried to whisper, but was still far too loud, “That’s it Cas! You’re the music! All the best Disney movies are musicals. You should totally do all the songs! I can’t sing for shit but you’re amazing!”